He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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