how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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