Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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