you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Can I color on your dick again?
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize