Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
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