Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
