Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
