dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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