When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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