it was like eating out sand paper
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
