what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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