Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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