Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize
