Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Randomize
