wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize
