Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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