Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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