Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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