He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
Randomize
