he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Randomize
