So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
