Who wears a wallet chain?!
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
