yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Randomize
