Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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