can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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