going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
