The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
