Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize