69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
