Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize