i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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