You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
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