Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
