Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Randomize