thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
