a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
