I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
