Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
