Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
