Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
