An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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