Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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