at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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