I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
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