I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Randomize
