are you so shy because you have an std?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
