Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Randomize
