i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
