I must be too annoying 4 u.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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