I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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